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Archive for February, 2010

Superbowl wrap up.

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

Every year the game suprises you.

SUPERBOWL

Despite all the hype you may hear and some of the cheesy ways they try to build it up, there is no doubt that Ace’s poker tournament really is the sporting event of the year.

The game starts early.

It’s 10 am and most of the players are there already, in the house is Ace, Woody, Nice Guy Eddie,  Chef, Alejandro and in walks J6 and the Rapper.

Alejandro comments that the only way to get a semi-tight game in against the Rapper is to start it early enough in the day to ensure that the Rapper hasn’t already started in on the coctails. The Rapper quips back that it would be a good strategy if he had actually gone to sleep last night and wasn’t still on a roll from the night before.

Cards are drawn to decide seats and the players each take their briefcase of cash to the teller to get their chips.

Ace has set up the place perfectly again this year, he even has those little tables behind the seats so you can put your drinks on them.

Gentlemen, shuffle up and deal!

The game is on. Blinds are $25/$50 and the tourney pays the top three only.

The game starts out quite tight. There is a little splashing around here and there, but for the most part a raise will take down the blinds most times. The golf pro shows up a bit late, but still manages to beat the the Mouth to the game who finally shows up, late as usual and immediately starts complaining about the valet parking, security at the door, his appearance fee, his seat, the blind structure and of course tries to lean the buyin.

The game slowly starts to gain some momemtum though.

Players settle into their seats and start making moves, out of the box the Rapper continues his ways from the last home game and reraises weakness mercilessly.

Ace is the first out.

Slowly Nice Guy Eddie, Alejandro, and the Golf Pro fall by the wayside also and the cash game gets started in the high roller room.

Meanwhile the bubble is approaching and the players can start smelling mountains of cash that is the prize money, or is that Ace’s chicken wings?

Dinner break for some delicious wings and salad. Nice Guy Eddie tries to break Joey Chestnuts world record for chicken wings and falls just shy, most likely due to the two super size big mac meals he had on the way over.

After the dinner break the final five aggree to put the game on pause for a couple so they can hit the washroom, grab some nicotine and assorted other duties.

Woody writes a page for himself in history beside the infamous Poker Dave shower and backs up the toilet on the break.

After much mocking the player’s settle back in and get the game underway again.

The players have shuffled around a bit and again the Mouth finds himself out of position against the Rapper who is on the Button and raises the Mouth’s blind. Not a great place for the Mouth to be as his stack is a little below average.

Call.

Out comes a 6 high flop and the Mouth shoves the rest of his stack in the middle and gets called by the Rapper who shows top pair, top kicker and fades the other two cards to take down the Mouth and make it 4 handed.

The player fold it around for a bit, raise, fold, raise, fold, Chef seems to be catching cards now and is slowly making dents in the stack of J6 who ends up pushing from the small blind and getting a reluctant call from Woody who tables KQ and hits a K to take down the A6 of J6 and send him to the rail as the bubble boy.

The final 3 agree to chop the winning and get the cash game going in earnest as it seems that Nice Guy Eddie is already on tilt and things are getting juicy already.

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Not much in terms of play in the opening hands except that Nice Guy Eddie continues to try and bluff his way through the Rapper and loses most of his stack getting his value bet/bluff called on the river.

Hand of the night is easily the 4 way all in between Golf Pro, Chef, Alejandro and the Mouth. AQ vs KK vs AQ vs 33.

Mouth says he is due to hit his set and sure enough does on the river, only the flopped nut flush from the Golf Pro has already sealed the hand for him.

I’d like to talk more about the game but had to go cover some other football game that was playing that night and to take off shortly after that.

Another great day at Ace’s tournament though, a big thanks to Ace and Mrs. Ace for their hospitality and hard work in putting together such a great day as always!

I can’t believe it’s not butter.

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

Well after getting about half way through the interview with J6 the Rapper dropped by to poach a free meal and get in on some of the wine action going on.

I’m not sure if this guy knows that you aren’t supposed to drink wine out of a beer bong, but I guess that’s a different story altogether.

The interview slowly degrades into a conversation about who is the hottest figure skater of all time and I turn the recorder off because this isn’t really going the direction I was hoping.

A couple more hours of wine and the limo driver comes to take us to the Captain’s for the game.

We all pile in the limo and I’m getting little sound bites here and there from J6 and the Rapper on the game ahead, J6 says he’s going to play his usual tight aggressive game and the Rapper is trying to figure out how to plug his i-pod into his phone so you can record crank calls to the Mouth.

The game has the Rapper, Woody, the Captain, Alejandro, Tiny Tim, J6 and the Mouth, I can’t remember all the details myself as the Champagne in the limo on the way over got a little out of hand and I’m pretty sure the Rapper stole my recorder for some shenanigans later.

There are some very dangerous things in life, Compton, loaded guys, Enriched Uranium, Grizzly bears on Meth, and the Rapper with as many cocktails in him and chips in front of him.

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“I raise”

“I re-raise”

“I raise”

“I’m all in”

“I raise”

“raise”

Hand after hand the Rapper takes down pots with who knows what, well, in fact he does show the odd bluff here which I think may have only made the situation worse.

The other players try and fight for orphan pots when the Rapper for some reason decides that T7 isn’t good enough to play to a raise and a re-raise from early position. The Mouth is obviously not happy with the Rapper sitting on his left raising his action all the time and his frustration shows later int he night which results in the Mouth pushing all in with 72 on a 26J flop and getting called by the Rapper with AJ. The Mouth throws some chairs around and goes over for his post game interview rant and is gone.

Things wrap up shortly after that with the Rapper walking with the lions share of the winnings for the night and promising to play a little tighter at the upcoming tournament at Ace’s.

Less than 24 hours TO GO!

Sunday, February 7th, 2010

Yes folks it on!

Less than 24 hours till the biggest sports event of the year.

All the the top companies in the world have been working since last year to craft commercials for the most expensive time slot in the world.

Households around North America have been planning for weeks and months to have everything perfect for a whole day of the greatest sporting event on the planet.

Yes folks, I’m talking about Aces yearly poker tournament.

It starts early, too early for this press reporter’s liking, only because I’ve been on the night shift ever since I shagged my editors college room mate…

 

and her twin sister…

 

and her yoga instructor.

But I digress.

The buzz is in the air, the fans are lined up, the interviews are being done and the showgirls are well…the showgirls are AWESOME!

More to come tomorrow.

Call him butter cause he’s on a roll.

Saturday, February 6th, 2010

So I’m called in to the bosses office the other day because it’s payday and I have to pleasure her sexually for a while before I get my paycheck from the last last article I wrote on the home game.

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Yes I know my boss looks just like Jennifer Aniston but I needed the money so I closed my eyes and gave her the best 2 hour orgasam of her life, picked up my check and was off to my next assignment.

Seems like the home game is starting a little late tonight so I make it over to J6’s house for an interview over dinner to get some background info on what’s happening in the EPT these days. (that’s Estonian Poker Tour for those not in the know). Well J6 was kind enough to allow us to raid his wine cellar for the dinner and interview and I have to say it was great to be able to get to see the man behind the poker face for some behind the scenes tips.

ARBF-So what is the key to your success in the home game J6?

J6-Three words my friend, tight, tight and tight.

ARBF-That’s a bit of a change from what we’ve been seeing from your play last year, is this a new strategy?

J6-Not at all. You don’t see all the times I fold Kings and Queens when I read my opponents for Aces, its not something you are going to see unless you have hole cams, but believe me, its what I do every day. Hell I fold AK all the time in tournaments, thats why I’m always at the final table my friend.

-to be continued

Joanna Krupa

Monday, February 1st, 2010

How many poles does it take to win a poker game?

Is there any way you could lose playing against her?

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Yes I’ll put the poker pictures of her first, because if I didn’t there is no way you would scroll down to see them

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joanna-krupa

Now, *drum roll* for the non poker playing pictures.

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Sorry, last one I have to put in large format. Because, well, you’ll see.

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